open & closed doors: summer 2022
Summer 2022. A period of time that was filled with family, friends, loving support, difficulties, inspiration, beautiful places, joyfulness, and The Well Wagon. Let's start from the beginning: my semester abroad in Madrid. Specifically, to a time when my flight back home was approaching and I had no idea what my summer plans were. I was encouraged to find an internship within my field of study so that I could get some experience that would heightened my college resume. The summer going into senior year of college is typically reserved for internships, and at my school, there is a pretty big stigma that "if you don't have an internship before you graduate, it's going to be really hard for you to get a job." So, due to fear and following to status quo, I applied to as many interesting internships that I could. And applied. And applied. And got no answers. With each rejection or non-response, I felt self-doubt creep in.
"Will I ever find a job?"
"What do they see about me that they don't like?"
"Why is this so difficult? So many people get internships all the time."
"Am I being too picky? Is 30+ applications not enough?"
"What am I doing wrong?"
I wasn't at peace with any of this. I thought that these internships would be interesting and that I would learn a lot, but there was always something in the back of my mind that was pulling me back home to The Well Wagon. I knew that one year of running my own business wasn't enough for me. I spent a full year building it and only one summer fulfilling the vision I had made. I wanted more. I wanted some time to make it into something bigger. But at the same time, I wasn't sure that this was the smartest choice for my future. So, after 2 months of this tug-of-war of wondering what the right choice was for me, I finally made a decision. I am going back home. I am doing The Well Wagon. It will be my top priority (other than my family and being a good daughter). And I will grow my business to the lengths that I have always wanted to.
Although I am a stickler for believing that there is always room for improvement, I feel really great about where The Well Wagon is right now. It's in a place that I pictured every day when I was transforming that rusty old trailer. It's become a part of who I am and a part of who I always dreamed of being. A person that is stronger than I was two years ago, more confident, more open, and more loving. Someone that takes on challenges, accepts them, figures them out, and learns from them. A person that realizes that self-reliance is a flaw and has to consciously remind themselves that their works are from God and for God. Someone that knows that God opens and closes doors so that He can lead them down a path that is in accordance with His will.
Today, I am forever grateful that God closed the doors on internship opportunities and kept the door to The Well Wagon wide open for me. He has taught me to not be afraid of the future and to hold His trusting hand down His beautiful path that was made just for me.
If you are frustrated with your life and don't know where you are going, it's okay. It happens to everyone multiple times during their lifetime. Give yourself some time and think about the doors that you have. Think about which ones give you peace and which ones make you anxious. Or which ones make you excited and which ones make you unsure if you will be happy. God will give you an answer that will bless you beyond measure....usually one that will give you peace, joy, and fulfillment.
Matthew 7:7 "Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you."